Whether you finished it or they did, the best thing you can do is accept that whatever you had is now over. The memories will fade with time and you need to focus on healing yourself, so firstly think about all the great times you had together. Then really think about how you felt, were you that happy? Did you have to compromise anything? Was it supposed to be about you but actually ended up being all about them?
In many relationships you think you are truly happy but then they end and then analysing and looking over the events that happened and enjoyed in a different light, will help you see what was really happening because if the relationship is over, it is because it wasn't perfect - so stop making it perfect in your own mind.
Now focus on some of the bad times, did they cheat? Did you cheat? If so why? What did you or they see in someone else that you didn't have? The answer will probably make you feel like it is your fault but no, if for whatever reason you aren't exactly what that person needs to maintain a successful relationship, that is no one's fault. You might just simply be wrong for each other. You can still be madly in love but wrong for each other, especially when you think about having a successful relationship means two people living one life. How much did you compromise and how much did they?
The important thing is to see your old relationship for how it actually was, were the best times that good? Were the bad times trying to tell you something! Now think about what you have learned about yourself. What are you prepared to do to make a relationship work going forward and would you really compromise yourself that much again?
Then focus on you. You have good qualities and have things about you that make you who you are, what are they? Write them down. Was there anything you old partner used to tease you about? Your hair, face, teeth or body and then think about what you know could be improved. Would improving some of your not so great bits make you feel better? Joining a gym or a new dating agency could help you establish yourself in a new light. You are a person of value and worth and you deserve to be respected and end up happy in a loving relationship and although that last one failed, there could be someone who is your true love just around the corner.
About The Author
Susan is a dating counsellor who helps couples and singles in the singles world. Susan works for Lovestruck.com who let you search and meet singles who live in your city. If you live in the UK then why not try dating in london and meet professionals, for a date at lunchtime or after work!| The author invites you to visit: http://www.lovestruck.com |
